Beginning at the End

I posted some dialog in December about what I felt I was missing and needed.
Explaining in detail what I wanted in someone trying not to sound conceited.
Putting it out in the universe even though I was feeling defeated.
Formulating my idea of how I want to be loved, held and treated.
And the qualities in a someone hoping my expectations could be exceeded.
Making sure this second chance I got is about mistakes not being repeated.
Three months later, I said yes to a connection that I felt wasn’t completed. 

Why did you allow me in? Who the hell are you? And where did you come from?
What have you been through to reach me on a level that I can’t even fathom?
Eight billion people on this planet and you’re evidence there’d be at least one.
Somebody that comprehends the similar circumstances we’ve had to overcome.
Never felt this safe, secure and vulnerable in the presence of anyone. 

You helped me exhale and that helped me release the burden of my past,
I was doin the internal work but didn’t know I was stuck and how long it’d last.
I declared I was good being alone, I was good working on this new found craft.
I’ve been working so hard to redirect my thoughts and accept my path.
They say “when you least expect it” and you appeared like a magic act.
Allowing me access to your life to see if I add to it and didn’t subtract.

The freedom I gained after we connected has given me hope for my future.
Building a foundation on friendship to help us decide if our connection is deeper.
If it is, I’m down to cultivate it, nuture it and promise to be a mindful leader.
And if we decide we are better off as friends, you are still a keeper.

When I’m with you, it’s like everyone disappears into the background.
Reciprocal conversation, a sharing of the floor, a respect of each other’s sound.
Spending a whole day together on multiple occasions is kinda profound,
without a preemptive plan to escape if the vibe loses high ground.
Breakfast, lunch and dinner, conversations in the whip, aimlessly driving around.
Taking me to places I’ve never been to, to experience new things in this town.
Creating new sets of memories to remember, cause in the old ones I would drown.

Honored to say the least, that you felt safe enough with me to reveal your history.
Indicating that the work I’ve been putting in is helping me attract what’s meant for me.
You will always have my gratitude, what you have given me is intangible, it set me free.
This was the last bit of healing, the final stage and I can feel the growth inside of me.

The bar was set pretty low by the person who held my options and I had to consider.
So I’m trying to accept that what you’re bringing to the table is common behavior.
When a person is respectful and considerate it makes me wanna return the favor.
Which allows me to be authentically me and savor moments when I choose to be braver.
Where would I be had I not walked through that door you opened 180 days later?
Prolly running in place hoping that someday my life could and would be better.
I knew something was gonna change, but I couldn’t put two and two together.
My intention was not to tear down your walls, but to show you that this me is like no other.

You have assisted in my evolution of becoming the best version of me.
I’m flabbergasted at how you can stand on your boundaries,
Speak your truth and communicate your intentions respectfully.
All while being mindful of the things that could possibly scar me.
I’ve never been around someone that connected with me this emotionally.
You’re a godsend you can’t be from here, and you will always be a friend to me.
Even if we can’t find each other and be involved romantically.

I’ve learned so much about myself in the short amount time we’ve spent,
It feels like I’ve known you forever, like I’ve been guided towards this event,
since I began this journey of self awareness and emotional acsent.
I feel like a huge weight has been lifted and no longer face discontent.
At this later stage in life finding and feeling connection hits different.
No breadcrumbing no guessing no games no need to hide or misrepresent.
Just respectful dialog communicated effectively with honest intent.

The future me sends his deepest and most heartfelt gratitude,
He knows you’ve helped him relieve his fear of a life of solitude.
His enthusiasm for life and eagerness to see what’s next has been renewed.
And he realized an acute sense of his intrinsic strength and fortitude.

I have found myself uncovering a freed me.
After finding you and your personality. 
And I know that you and I will always be.

Connected by our complimentary energy.